Somebody is using an autotranslater to hilarious effect in this Photoshop resumé (tutorial?).

A few gems:

“… i inject some changes in Hue and Saturation value and sharpness of whimsy to display sediment.”

“Well, here are some instructions on how to grind your whimsy.”

“If you name one’s fiddle with on exaggerated sharpening then diet the impermeability of this layer.”

The whole thing wraps up with this common Photoshop technique:

“To smarmy in default the effect, apart out to Filter – Noise – Median and into a value of 3.”

If only this weren’t so accurate.

Interesting post over on theonlinephotographer about retouching and responsibility. I like Katrin Eismann’s solution to the problem (read the comments). What is your take on this issue?

Color Management Specialist/Workflow Consultant and all-around nice guy Jay Kinghorn is writing a series of primer articles on Color Management that everyone should read. The first two articles are here. Jay can be found here. Update: The third in the series is here.

People are asking. I’m answering:

Cycle Blending Modes Backward: Shift and -
Cycle Blending Modes Forward: Shift and +

I’ll write a comprehensive post on Blending Modes soon, with extra Mathy Goodness for all you compositing geeks out there. If you’re too excited to wait, go get and read The Art and Science of Digital Compositing by Ron Brinkmann. I was very excited to note that there is a second Edition, and One-Clicked it right away. The First Edition rocked. Thanks to Lexi at Sterling-Rice Group for getting me to post on this subject.

You still suck at Photoshop. Season 2, by popular demand. This week: Smart Objects. Go Ronnie Go!

But you have to turn the color management switch on. Read all about it on Rob Galbraith’s site.

Deke McLelland has lost his marbles. Guess he’s lived in Boulder too long.

Here is a transcription. (free registration required)

The rumor mill is gearing up to grind out all sorts of nasty stories about Unilever and the Dove ‘Real Beauty’ campaign. Retoucher Pascal Dangin’s comments were placed in the wrong context on the New Yorker website, and a bunch of people are jumping up and down claiming that the photos were retouched. (The New Yorker profile, by the way, is quite amusing. The writer, Lauren Collins, seems inexperienced, in love with Dangin, and gullible. “He has been known to work for days tinting a field of grass what he considers the most expressive shade of green.” Puh-leeze!

The real story, parts one and two, is available on the AdAge website.

Why do so many assume that the bad or unpleasant is the truth?